philmorris

tk \| 11 December, 2006
Phil Bebbington, British Photographer, December 2006 Seagull 4A \|Kodak T400CN I wanted to tell this weirdo to push off. But at the same time I didn't want to get too close to him for fear of heavy globules of speculum being sprayed all over me. In any case he was freaking me out with wildly odd behaviour. Most times scampering around chasing after large balls of wool he kept in his camera bag. Other times he'd just stand there licking his hand like it was an ice-cream. I told him that all this leaping about was doing my head in and he should keep still. I said if he wanted to take photos with me he would need to produce some ID. So he threw this see-through plastic wallet my way which had some personal details inside. I told him to quit licking his paws and to stick his hands up where I could see 'em. On the ID card was an amateur looking photo of an elderly looking gentleman well past his sell by date, with ridiculous painted-on whiskers and silly ears. Quite evidently he was completely crap with photoshop. On the photo side, underneath, was the name Phil Bebbington after which some professional had written 'Who I personally certify is a fruitcake'. I flipped it over. My heart missed a beat and a trickle began to run down my trousers. I read it once and then again and then I read it all over. It said: ‘You just eyeballed the’ and then along the next line in quite ridiculous parenthesis and double spaced lower case letters, appeared [t e r r o r k i t t e n]
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tk \| 11 December, 2006
Phil Bebbington, British Photographer, December 2006 Seagull 4A \|Kodak T400CN I wanted to tell this weirdo to push off. But at the same time I didn't want to get too close to him for fear of heavy globules of speculum being sprayed all over me. In any case he was freaking me out with wildly odd behaviour. Most times scampering around chasing after large balls of wool he kept in his camera bag. Other times he'd just stand there licking his hand like it was an ice-cream. I told him that all this leaping about was doing my head in and he should keep still. I said if he wanted to take photos with me he would need to produce some ID. So he threw this see-through plastic wallet my way which had some personal details inside. I told him to quit licking his paws and to stick his hands up where I could see 'em. On the ID card was an amateur looking photo of an elderly looking gentleman well past his sell by date, with ridiculous painted-on whiskers and silly ears. Quite evidently he was completely crap with photoshop. On the photo side, underneath, was the name Phil Bebbington after which some professional had written 'Who I personally certify is a fruitcake'. I flipped it over. My heart missed a beat and a trickle began to run down my trousers. I read it once and then again and then I read it all over. It said: ‘You just eyeballed the’ and then along the next line in quite ridiculous parenthesis and double spaced lower case letters, appeared [t e r r o r k i t t e n]
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